At Long Last, Crunch Time

"Talk about the matchup we waited our whole lives for …

Bryant Gumbel vs. Paul Allen!

What's the chance of them fighting a steel cage death match?

Things look that bad — as things figured to at this point with the warring parties already out $330 million … soon to be $660 million when Jefferson Davis, er, David Stern cancels two more weeks.

The NBA trotted out Allen, the nation's No. 23-ranked billionaire, now cautioning prudence after years of $100 million payrolls and $40 million luxury tax bills, to represent (but not speak for) for its hard-pressed owners.

Meanwhile, Gumbel, the itinerant anchor, took up the players' cause and, mistaking the negotiations for a revolution, denounced the "infamously arrogant" Stern as a wannabe plantation owner.

Gumbel is, of course, even more infamously arrogant, so at least he knew whereof he spoke on that one.

So the NBA is in a bad place, indeed … or not.

We haven't seen yet, but we will soon."

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